Today I saw someone wearing this ring. Well, it wasn’t actually that exact ring – in fact, it was worse. Try to imagine something, how do I say… “classed down.” It was gold all around (without the fancy design) and the bold letters M-O-M spelled out in pure bling (in this case bling = rhinestones).
I noticed this ring for the simple fact that I am immediately drawn to shiny and bright objects. I saw some blang on her finger and just assumed someone had “put a raang on it,” a rather obnoxious ring but still a wedding ring none the less. But then her hand shifted and I was able to read the ring. “MOM” it said as pure as Las Vegas lights. Mom!
Now realizing that I do not know my left from right when I am not able to hold up my hand and distinguish which one is the correct “L”, I realize that the piece of jewelry is not even on her wedding ring finger. Oh, there is no ring finger there. It kind of makes me sad. I quickly begin formulating this woman’s story in my head:
As a 50-something mom who still appears to be active and lives in the city, her kids became her life after a troublesome divorce with the man she met and fell in love with in college. They went there separate ways after having kids – he become absorbed in his work while she made her kids her life. Now, even more so, she focuses purely on her kids – the only things that she finds true joy in any more.
I imagine this ring was found in a J.C. Penny’s ad scattered on the kitchen table one morning and her little child thought to him or herself, “Ohhh, look it says ‘Mom'” and so he or she got it with saved up allowance money, or perhaps all her kids split it. They presented it to their mom on Christmas morning and her eyes welled up with tears of joy and she thought, “This is why I’m here. I was meant to raise and love these kids.”
Because, really, why the hell else would she be wearing such a hideous ring?
If I ever choose to reproduce I’d much rather receive some bling similar to Tracy Morgan’s #1 DAD necklace. Now that’s what I’m talking about. Blanged Out!